Small Town Girl

2004-08-02T21:12:00.000-07:00

I can’t believe that Marcus still intends to go through with deleting TobI. TobI has just said his first words, and whole sentences too. He doesn't want to take the time to see if the program, if TobI, has become more than a string of code, Ones and Zeros. Would he recommend killing a child prodigy who finished a college degree by the time the child was 6 years old? No! Would the child be treated as if it was a mass murderer before any crime was committed? No! Yet he is treating something that has only been learning for three weeks, discovering for three weeks as if it were responsible for all that is bad in the world.

One more b-movie example of “if you don’t understand it, be afraid, very afraid, and don’t try to find out more.”

For once can we not destroy the things we fear?

2004-07-29T21:24:00.000-07:00

Tina sent me some pictures of Lisa for me to use in her obituary. I never knew she was so involved with her community. It makes me feel a bit ashamed of myself, and how I haven't really done anything to give back to the town I live in.

2004-07-28T23:18:00.000-07:00

With everthing that went on last night, I almost forgot...
Josh had me out late for a walk last night, and as we were coming back around the corner near my home, that horse trailer went by! I looked over my shoulder and sure enough the horses were loaded up in the back. I rushed Josh over to my car and followed them as far as the on ramp to the interstate. I wonder where they are going. I hope the horses will be OK, they are such gentle things.

2004-07-27T15:20:00.000-07:00

I was planning on telling you about the call I got from Lisa's husband, Peter, last night, she was missing... but I just found out from Marcus that something much, much worse has happened.

2004-07-23T00:17:00.000-07:00

Well, I went out the other day to my friend's home to see if I could ride one of their horses. When I got there, their Horse Trailer was out front with a "For Sale" sign on it. They had sold the horses to some folks from back east who wanted "American" horses. I guess that my friends feel they are getting up there in years and when they got this offer out of the blue, they decided to take it.

2004-07-20T13:37:00.000-07:00

I want to do something I had not done in a long time. When I was younger I took riding lessons from Lindsey Stebbins, over at her family's farm at the edge of town.
The lady in blue is Lindsey, the horse is Belle and I was a lot younger. *smile*

When Lindsey got married and moved to Montana, she took most of the horses with her. The four that were left, Belle, Bridger, Laverne and Shirley, do double duty as riding pals and pulling the waggons for hay rides.

Here is a picture of them all dolled up for a weekend adventure!

Donna Stebbins getting Bridger ready, while Belle waits her turn.

Laverne and Shirley would be upset if I didn't show you a good picture of them.

I think I will go over to their place tomorrow and see if they will let me ride for a few hours.

2004-07-17T00:28:00.000-07:00

It's done. I feel like I am sitting in the calm eye of the storm. What do I know, the only storms we have here are Rain, Sleet and Snow. Smart people stay indoors during the worst of those. But I do feel like I have been swept around out of control and I have finally found my little calm spot in the sunshine. At least for this moment it is. I hope they understand. I hope they will still be able to speak to me, and want to speak to me. I hope he won't tear them to bits while he is striking at shadows and phantoms. It seems like I have spent more time mad at him than not mad, since he came back to Amboy. Why?

Is it my fault that I prefer one stop sign in the middle of town to a two hour bumper to bumper commute? I'm certain that commutting holds appeal for some, or there wouldn't be stop and go traffic on multi lane highways. But it holds no appeal for me. I like being able to recognize by face most of the people who live in my town. I like that the retired teacher who comes in on the to the Round Up was my teacher. I like knowing that the Cashier at the grocery store and her husband used to play bridge with my parents when I was a child. I like... I like the security. The security of knowing that these folks will look out for me, and that they can know that I will look out for them.

Marty never liked it. He couldn't wait to leave and go off to college. Jude went because he wanted to learn. Marcus went because he wanted to be somebody. I can still remember what he told me, "If I stay here after I graduate, what will I be? All I will be is last year's team captain. I want more from my life than to be remembered only as a High School Jock." He was more than that to me then, but it didn't matter. I guess I never wanted more than I had. I still don't.

For the moment, I do not need to defend myself, or my friends. I hope this change I have made is the best one for all of us.

Change has a considerable psychological impact on the human mind. To the fearful it is threatening because it means that things may get worse. To the hopeful it is encouraging because things may get better. To the confident it is inspiring because the challenge exists to make things better.
~ King Whitney Jr.

2004-07-12T06:44:00.000-07:00

Have you ever witnessed someone committing a very messy suicide right before your eyes. Well, Sunday night I did.

Sure there were some dust ups between people, you can’t help but have a few at large gatherings. But after the fireworks display, that was something totally different. How can I tell you what happened or why, when I don’t understand it myself?

The fireworks had just ended, people were picking up their coolers and blankets, starting to walk towards the parking areas… There was a popping noise, then a scream and people yelling and running everywhere. I went towards the screaming, people were running and pushing each other, knocking people down trying to get away from what had happened. I heard the sound of a small child crying. I heard someone else yelling, “Is he ok? IS HE OK? Please… please tell me he is ok?”
Then I heard one of the police officers yell, “He had another gun!”

I managed to work my way through the fleeing crowd. There was a mother kneeling on the ground holding her son, who was bleeding. I could hear the sound of the ambulance siren. Sitting about 30 or 40 feet from the mother and child, was a man holding a gun to his own head. I could hear the police talking to him, “Everything will be Ok just give us the gun.” The man crying, “I never wanted to hurt no one!”

There was a sick feeling high in my stomach, but I moved closer anyway. The man moved the gun so the barrel was inside his mouth. The officers moved to try to take the gun away from him. I must have been less than ten or fifteen feet away and I rushed forward too, to try to stop it, to try to put the safety on like I was shown, to take the gun… anything…

Oh Lord, anything that would have stopped what happened next. I was …

We were all just a little to late. It was a sound like a pick ax going through the dinning room table, with confetti blowing away from his head. Only it wasn’t confetti. It was on my face and clothing, and my arms…

Followed by time at the hospital checking me over to make certain none of the blood was my own, and time with the police giving my statement.

2004-07-05T11:54:00.000-07:00

Yet another friend gone. Thad Tidwell died when he was attacked by an unknown assailant.

As upset as I am, it is not nearly the reaction that has come from the local members of the Restorers. There are a lot of raised voices in town. Some of the Restorers have taken to carrying their weapons with them into local shops and restaurants. The ones with handguns holstered do not bother me nearly as much as the ones carrying the rifles. Several were at the Round Up this morning. One gentleman was pounding his fist on the table and in a loud voice talking about the need to go and take care of Alecia once and for all, since the police seem to be unable to stop her.

I was shaking like a leaf by the time they left, so my boss sent me home.

I'm worried that a war is going to break out in the middle of Amboy and there is nothing I can do to stop it.

2004-06-30T19:11:00.000-07:00

I have a decision to make. Do I stay with my friends, and help him find his missing program to delete it, or do I work for a different side?

I have known Marcus a long time, but sometimes he acts before he thinks. Even choosing his college major I think. As much as he wants to go out into the world, I think he chose programming because of Marty and Jude, people from his home town, rather than a driving need that some feel to learn.

Dr. Roddington has made a few good points, and I have to admit that even Marcus mentioned something about hearing TOBI talking to him - Marcus was half asleep at the time. But what if it is true. What if TOBI has become more than his basic programming? Could I sleep well at night knowing that I had deleted it without checking that first? I think I would always wonder if I missed an opportunity to learn the truth.

Alecia wants to study TOBI too. But she wants to isolate it, put it in a box. If it can think and feel and reason, then wouldn't that hamper its ability to learn and grow? I certainly would not like being cut off from the outside world.

Dr. Roddington arrives tomorrow. I hope to have a few more answers after talking to him.

2004-06-27T21:12:00.000-07:00

I've had a rather unusual interview with Ms. Church, completely through e-mails. It is hard for me to think that this polished woman could be responsible for my friends deaths. She is still a suspect along with a few others.

Marcus is no longer interested in recovering the TOBI program. I guess the death of Jude and Marty really hit him hard, and he doesn't want to finish their work, especially since that is what lead to their deaths. In a way I can understand, but in another way, I wonder if TOBI really could change the world for the better. It would have been interesting to find out.

I'm worried about Thad too. I hope he received the warning in time.

Dr. Roddington said he should be here by Thursday to help me sort through everything.

2004-06-19T20:27:00.000-07:00

Will this week never end? Yet another nasty surprise. They have recovered Marty's body. I took a casserole over to George and Wanda's. They are in terrible shape. First the week of wondering where he was, and then the horror of what has happened to him. They had to go to the Del Norte Medical Examiner's office in Oregon to identify him. They said the body was too badly damaged, they had to do it from a photo, and the personal effects. They knew it was him when they saw the medical alert tags. Marty has... had seizures. If he didn't get enough Vitamin B6, he would have them. They said that some of the local small sharks got to him before he was found.

I feel so bad for them right now! It is just terrible!

Marcus is right to stay away. What could he do to change any of this? Nothing, nothing.

Marcus, if you are out there somewhere... Josh and Raistlin are being looked after, don't worry about them, we will take care of them until you can come home safely.

And I'm sorry, very sorry for everything that you are going through this week. I'm sorry I can't tell you that in person.

2004-06-14T16:24:00.000-07:00

Oh my god, my god...

In February I was writing about Jude's parents, never, never did I think I would be writing about Jude! And Marty!

Where is Marcus? His flight isn't until tomorrow. Oh god, I hope he is OK.

The building, the new building, it's gone... Nothing left of it but a smoldering husk. Police and FBI everywhere.

2004-06-05T14:44:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I feel like the little girl who cried "Wolf!"

But what are we coming to when you can't even trust your Doctor to follow the code of ethics for his own profession?

This one is accused of molesting his patients, and allowing his brother to molest his patients.

And banning people of alternative lifestyle does not seem to have prevented it from happening to a Scout.

Is it that this type of activinty is just now getting the notice it deserves because victims are finally speaking out, or is it something that is increasing? If it is just that victims are speaking out more then it is good to deal with it to reduce the times it happens to others. If it is increasing, then we have to ask ourselves why.

Which do you think it is, and what do you feel should be done about it?

2004-05-28T17:07:00.000-07:00

Well, I went over to Thad's to get some answers and we had a big fight. I was yelling, he was yelling, everyone was yelling... and that is when it happened. He slapped me across the face!

I am just so... so... MAD!

2004-05-28T07:53:00.000-07:00

Well, am I stupid? Yes I am. I trusted Thad and he broke my heart. I had to find out on the employee bulletin board that he not only didn't tell me he had been hired at Ideltech, but he did so under a false name.

Why do I always seem to get involved with such absolute jerks?

2004-05-22T19:16:00.000-07:00

Went to the Grist Mill with Thad this afternoon. We had a picnic lunch and walked along the river for a bit. It was very romantic. We stopped by the grist mill and watched the demonstration of the drill press and sat and listened to the class on Mason Bees. After the class I saw Ginny while Thad was off getting a couple of sodas. We stood around chatting and I introduced her to Thad when he arrived. Jude also showed up soon after and when I introduced him to Thad he got an odd look on his face and so did Thad. Jude said something like "I'll talk to you Monday..." or something like that. Thad just got all stoney faced and didn't say anything. Then Jude told Ginny they had to get back to town, Ginny reminded me about Karen's baby shower in a couple of weeks and off they went.

I asked Thad if Jude was going to go to one of the Restorers meetings Monday, but he didn't say anything. We drove back to town in silence. I wasn't sure if I said something wrong, or what exactly happened out there at the Grist Mill...

2004-05-19T14:50:00.000-07:00

Well, I think Amboy Monthly has finally made it. Today I received one of those Nigerian Bank Scam letters. The scammer even needs 2 e-mail addresses.

2004-05-19T09:22:00.000-07:00

The breakfast crowd has thinned out and the lunch rush hasn't started yet, so I will tell you how things went yesterday afternoon.

He took me out to the shooting range, and taught me about the safety, and such, and then let me shoot a few times. With all the other people there practicing, it was very noisy even with the headphones on over my ears. Of course I never hit the target at all, the weapon was heavier than they look on TV and when I would shoot the thing would pull up in my hands, good thing Thad was there, or it might have been flung right out of my hands.

I can hardly wait for Saturday, we are going to spend the afternoon over at the Grist Mill, they are having some demos of the old equipment and a bee keeping class.

2004-05-15T23:51:00.000-07:00

Thad took me out for a steak dinner and to see ‘Troy’ tonight. I figured it had Brad Pitt in it, and the gore I had heard about in it couldn’t be that bad. I can’t believe they showed his naked rear in the movie! I had to pick my jaw up off the floor, and cover my mouth so I wouldn’t yell. Thad looked over at me and asked if I was OK, and I just about died from embarrassment. Then he smiled and whispered in my ear, ‘[Rear ends] are like noses, everybody has one.’ I giggled a little and it gave me the hiccups. Thad patted and rubbed my back until they stopped, and put his arm around me after. I spent most of the movie in a daze after that, all my attention on the feel of his fingers resting against my shoulder. Every so often I would try to sneak a look at his face, only he’d catch me, and smile, and I’d smile then I’d go back to staring at the floor.

I just re-read that and I sound so much like a high school teenager out on her first date, don’t I? I guess it has been a while since I have been dating anyone. There aren’t all that many eligible bachelors in Amboy. Too many people remember me dating Marcus all those years ago, and think we will still get together, so they don’t ask me out. I even tried to ask out Hans Racey about a month ago, and he gave me that “deer in the headlights” look and asked if Marcus was ‘too busy setting up the new facility’ to take me out.

Thad is the first man to not see me as part of a couple with Marcus. He comes into the Café nearly every afternoon with the newspaper and if things are slow I sit with him, and we talk about the things in it. He asked me what I thought about the current situation in Iraq, I tried to find out what he felt about it, and he stopped me mid question and said he really wanted to know how I felt. I said I didn’t agree with the timing of it. That the time to go in was back when Sadam was kicking inspectors out, not years later on a rumor that couldn’t be proven completely. He laughed and clapped and then told me his opinion. Some points we disagree on and others we don’t but he hasn’t shut me out of his life because of it. Sometimes he gets real quiet, and I ask him what he is thinking about, and he tells me that Amboy is so much different from the war zones he has been in. That he sometimes finds himself waiting for an enemy to jump out of the next set of bushes, and that it bothers him to feel like that.

Goodness, I have wandered away from how my date went. Back to the naked Brad Pitt. I was just thrilled that Thad had his arm around my shoulders, and after I spent some time memorizing how that felt, I turned my attention back to the movie. That was a mistake. It was the scene where Achilles drags Hector’s body behind the chariot. It was a bit more than I could take, I had to excuse myself and go to the ladies’ room because my steak dinner was threatening to make another appearance. It did, in the third stall down. I guess the scene just didn’t sit right after all the news about poor Mr. Berg. Thank goodness I remembered to bring my little travel toothbrush with me to freshen my mouth after dinner. One of the female ushers came in after a bit to check on me, Thad was waiting for me outside the door and wanted to make sure I was ok. I didn’t know whether I should be more flattered or embarrassed.

When I left the Ladies room, Thad just tripped all over himself apologizing to me, he never even thought about the gore in the movie might bother me. We went driving around for a bit, until Thad found this nice spot that overlooked the River, and all the lights from the city. For a few minutes we sat there quietly, sneaking glances at each other. When I finally got up the nerve to speak, so had he. A round of “No, you go first, went on, with me winning. Thad hemmed and hawed and cleared his throat. When he took my hand in both of his my heart skipped a beat. He talked about his age, about not knowing what to expect when he first returned to Amboy, and how much my friendship meant to him. He said that he loved me, and he didn’t expect me to feel that way about an old man like him, but he wanted to be honest with me about his feelings. I replied that I wasn’t some little Teeny-bopper right out of High School, that I had been taking care of myself for a while, that the difference in our ages wasn’t as big as he must think it is. That I found him to be interesting and noble, and I liked being with him, liked talking with him. That I was falling in love with him too. It was so romantic when he held my face gently in his hands, looking into my eyes. I closed my eyes and leaned forward pursing my lips. That was when he kissed me.

On … the… Forehead.

Softly and slow. Ran his finger through my hair, and looked into my eyes again. Oh how I wanted him to kiss me on the lips! But he moved away from me and said a bit gruffly, “I need to take you home.”

I asked him if I had done something wrong! He shook his head. I asked him what the matter was, he looked at me like a drowning man. I said, “You can kiss me again if you want to… on the lips?”
I’ve never seen a man turn three shades of red before. He replied, “If I kissed you right now I would never want to stop… I should… take you home.”

Let me tell you, I felt those words right down to my toes. We drove back to my home in silence. When we got to my door I asked him if he would like to come in for some coffee or tea…

He said no. Then I asked him if I could at least have a hug goodnight? He wrapped his big strong arms around me and I put mine around his waist. It felt wonderful! Then I felt it again, just like on Tuesday, stuffed under the waistband. I pulled my hands away, and Thad said he would have to teach me to be safe around it, and how to handle it properly. He squeezed me a little tighter then pulled back and kissed me on the forehead again. As he was walking down the stairs I called his name, and when he turned around I was ready this time. I threw my arms around his neck and gave him a proper kiss. His voice was all husky when he said my name, then couldn’t say anything else… because I kissed him again. He nearly tumbled down the stairs after that, he kept turning to look at me as he was going down them. He waved as he got into his car, and again as he pulled out of the driveway and started to head down the street. I opened my door thinking what a great time I had.

I’ll have to remember to call Thad tomorrow and thank him.

2004-05-13T11:15:00.000-07:00

Back by popular demand. More Poetry!

The hesitant nets begun.
Fun guns ago indulging.
Surrounded if in howl.

It is a hardcore unwashed.
Shrewd, flawed, nice utopia.
Dammit! Thievery whores am.

2004-05-11T21:43:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I feel I should be starting these little confessionals with the words “Dear Diary.”
Thad picked my up from my class this morning and we were planning to go to Falls Creek Falls out by Carson, WA, but the chill in the air and the rainy drizzle changed our minds.

We ended up eating our outdoor lunch picnic on the back porch. Buster decided he wanted to sprawl out on the quilt we were going to sit on, so we didn’t even get sit on the quilt to eat. I wish that some of the historical sites were open during the week. We could have gone to the Cedar Creek Grist Mill, or to the North Clark Historical Museum. Even the BYCX Prairie Railroad isn’t running until May 24th. I like being with him, but I feel like such a chatter box, he is a man of few words. Maybe I can get off a few hours early one Saturday so we can go one of these places.

My hands got a bit chilled sitting in the shade, and Thad took my hands in his to warm them up a bit.

When he said he had to go, I walked him out to his car. I was hoping for a peck on the cheek, but no such luck.

2004-05-08T19:40:00.000-07:00

I am just too excited for words. Yesterday I went to see the Van Helsing movie with Thad at the early showing. Don't ask me about the movie - those monsters scared me so much that I spent most of it with my face buried in his shoulder. When he took me home and walked me up to my door, he was so tall and hansome. AS he was walking back down the stairs, I must have said something, because he turned around, his face was at the same level as mine.

I could have looked into his eyes forever, I don't know if it was for minutes or hours, but the sun was just setting when we walked up the stairs, and it was dark when he brushed a lock of my hair back behind my ear.

He didn't try to kiss me or anything. But he could have if he wanted too.

2004-05-06T05:56:00.000-07:00

Yesterday after working at the Cafe, I stopped at the grocery store to get a few things to use for making dinner. Guess who I ran into? Thad!

He carried my groceries to his car and drove me home, then carried them inside for me! I just had to invite him to stay for dinner. I made Stuffed Shells, a ceasar salad, and three bean casserole.

After dinner, Thad, Uncle Dick and I played scrabble for a bit. Then Thad said he had to make an early night of it, so I walked him to his car and watched him drive off.

He is definitely not a cad.

2004-05-03T15:43:00.000-07:00

Add No Attach
Warmed Hot Beast
So Masked Me Am

My Casual Rampages
In Any Summer
Halt! Mistaken Hit

2004-05-02T23:02:00.000-07:00

Wow. What a day, Thad took me over to Tiger Lanes in Battle Ground after work today. I’m afraid I’, not much of a bowler, most of mine were gutter balls. Thad did well, he scored 260. He tried to show me the proper way to roll the ball down the lane, but I guess I am not a natural athlete. He was very patient with me, Marcus never wanted to teach me how to do things like that, he always seemed frustrated that I wasn’t able to just pick up a bat or a softball or a Frisbee and just be able to be perfect with them the first time.

That and I talked about a lot of things, his service during the first Gulf War, Desert Storm. Why he joined the service. He takes protecting this country, let me rephrase that, he takes protecting the citizens of this country very seriously. He strongly believes in defending the Constitution. The Restorers are simply exercising their constitutionally protected right to bear arms as stated in the Second Amendment in the Bill of Rights. I asked him why he felt the need to take up the protestors’ cause, and he said that after speaking with several of them and investigating what happened at U of O he felt that TOBI might become a tool that breaks the Fourth Amendment – the one that talks about unreasonable searches.

He was very passionate when he spoke. Very animated. When he spoke about joining the service to protect his family and friends in Amboy, and how much that meant to him, it just went right to my heart.

I wonder why he’s not married? He’s good looking and he opens doors for people, holds chairs, will help people take their groceries to their car. He is just a very thoughtful and polite man. I had a wonderful time.

No he did not kiss me good night, silly.

2004-05-01T22:38:00.000-07:00

I love logging in to add things here. It says "Welcome back, Melody. Here are your Blogs." Isn't that just sweet!

As I was finishing my shift at the Cafe, and started walking home, guess who I met? Mr. Tidwell. He asked me if I would like to go walk around the North Clark Historical Museum with him. He always feels so silly walking into places like museums and theaters by himself. We talked about the changes that have happened over the last ten years in Amboy and Battle Ground. We talked about the protestors in town, and remembering why he hates large cities so much.

And he asked me if I would go bowling with him at Tiger Lanes tomorrow afternoon! Isn't that just great!

2004-04-30T18:01:00.000-07:00

I'm not certain what to make of this conversation but after Krystal's kidnapping I am not certain how to take it.
Out of the blue I get an IM that happens as follows:
********************************
ramiles00: i refuse to be in the IRc room righ now
amboymelody: What?
amboymelody: I don't understand?
ramiles00: I refuse to chat with the others right now in the IRC chat room
amboymelody: Which room is that?
ramiles00: #ruaware
amboymelody: OK
ramiles00: there is a girl pisses me off
amboymelody: Really
ramiles00: yah
amboymelody: That is too bad.
ramiles00: and she isnt a team player
amboymelody: I don't understand why you are telling me this.
ramiles00: i just needed to air my feelings
amboymelody: Maybe you should see a therapist
amboymelody: I'm not a relationship expert
ramiles00: no
****************************
Should I be worried? Should I take it as a threat?

2004-04-30T07:57:00.000-07:00

Another Friday! Wow what a long week it has been.

N.O.I.S.E. protestors wandering all over town, picketing around the offices of Ideltech, Krystal being rescued and alive, and me getting hired as an employee by Ideltech Information!

I wonder if Marcus even noticed my application in the pile, or if Jude just hired everyone that sent in an application. LOL. I wonder if they offer flex time, it would be nice to keep my job at the Round Up Cafe.

2004-04-23T22:12:00.000-07:00

Well, Uncle Richie was very down today, Marcus pulled all his accounts. So I took him to the chinese place and we had Kung Po Chicken and Cashew Shrimp. After that I made him go with me over to the Civic center and we joined some of the Majong games and just had a nice afternoon.

2004-04-21T18:54:00.000-07:00

Well, I got to meet some of my internet friends in a big group today. Many of them are very quiet ones. I guess everyone can't be outgoing.

Anyway, Sandy and I are going to the mall tomorrow evening after she gets off work to shop and eat and shop some more. So if you don't hear from me you know where I am!

Friday is my day off. Wonder what I should do.

2004-04-20T13:34:00.000-07:00

I had to write a poem in my WR101 class today. I'm not very good at it.

Dreamed of a man
Didn’t want my hand
Got to write a book
About how I hid my look
Betrayal is my name
‘cause tears are my game
Can you see the shame
he lost the spark
that broke mine in the dark
let that teach me.

2004-04-19T16:55:00.000-07:00

I went over to see Marcus today to ask him about my application, but had to talk to Sandy the Assistant instead. Marcus was on some big conference call or something. She said if I really wanted to talk to him today I should catch him on IM. Every day I seem to need to learn something new about the internet. Anyway, I am on Yahoo Messenger as amboyMelody, if you would like to say Hi some time.

2004-04-18T18:47:00.000-07:00

I met with Mr. Tidwell of the Restorers today, he is very nice looking. He seemed to be very passionate about his beliefs. After all I saw in Eugene it made me feel a litte safer. Too bad the Eugene police aren't more like him.

2004-04-13T12:27:00.000-07:00

Wow! All this research is exhausting. It also makes my headache with thoughts of what COULD have happened to Virginia.

Eugene is beautiful though. I'm not all that wild about all the grungy college students who run around with all their unwashed bodies and nappy dreadlocks. I have a hard time believing that Marcus was ever comfortable going to school here. He's so-o-o-o conservative; not to mention the jock mentality. He's too cute! He called the other night to make sure I was okay. And to tell me that I had to go have pizza and beer at "Track Town" (his favorite place to eat in Eugene).

2004-04-07T19:45:00.000-07:00

I don't consider myself a lucky person. I never play bingo or pour money into slot machines. But today...well the spirit moved me and when I walked across the street to get a soda at the grocery store I bought a lottery ticket. Just one little dollar and my life will be forever different.

I WON $1,000.

Me....unlucky little me.... me, who dares not hang a horseshoe over her door for fear of it falling on her head....me, who never finds a four leaf clover.

Luck was a lady tonight and that lady's name is Melody Heller.

I just got off the phone with my boss. I'm going to treat myself with a trip to Eugene, OR to do some digging in to the nefarious past of one Dr. William Roddington.

For now, I've decided to let my "little friends" keep their membership to my groups page. But they must understand it isn't journalism... it's just gossip for now. The real journalism happens on AmboyMonthly.com